Baby Girl

I have sat down to write this post at least five times, and each time I felt like I wasn't sure what I wanted to say, so rather than keep the draft and come back to it later, I scrapped it every time.  Now that it's done, and looking over it, (with happy tears streaming down my face, I might add) I think this will work.

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted boys.  I have no explanation for this, other than the fact that I remember thinking in middle school that when I got my boys, I was going to raise them to be kind to everyone, including girls like me.  As a seventh grader, I didn't feel like I knew any boys who fit that profile.

When we found out we were having our son, I was just as surprised as anyone else.  As far as I was concerned, there was a 50/50 chance I would get my boy.  This time, from the moment I saw the plus sign on the pregnancy test, I knew this was going to be a girl.  I'm not sure how or why I was so sure,  but there are few things in my life of which I have been this certain.  My husband rolled his eyes, but I told him to mark my words - we were having a girl.  This meant I had about sixteen weeks to mourn the loss of my son Ben (yes, we already had a name - in fact, we named him years ago), and look toward the arrival of a daughter.  I thought this would be a difficult process, and mourning Ben kind of was, but I was surprised at how quickly I adjusted to the idea of a baby girl.  Here are some of the pluses I had come up with:

• God's master plan - I don't believe for a second that she is a girl on accident.  We are supposed to have a girl, and we are supposed to have her.
• Shopping - For every rack of boy clothes at the store, there are are at least three racks of girls clothes! (Not that I ever shop for clothes at the store, but you know...)
• A new challenge - though I am currently feeling like I am new-challeneged out with my current child
• Potty-training - I hear this is easier with girls!
• A Friend - she will be a friend later in life.  This isn't to say that my son won't, but I know from observation that girls usually stick with their moms later in life than those boys
• (This is the big one) My husband will be a dad to a daughter - my husband is the most caring, kind, sensitive, and loving man I have ever known.  My one regret about having all boys would have been that our daughter, whoever she may have been, would have missed out on the experience of having my husband as her father and I would have missed out on witnessing it.  Now, watching my husband love, care for, and protect our daughter is one of the things I am looking forward to most.

There are more, I'm sure, but these were the ones I could easily come up with.  Fast-forward to last week.  The lady didn't even have to look - it was maybe the second shot on the screen and there was no thing.  Just three little lines.  I gave my husband the I-told-you-so-look just before the sonographer confirmed what I had already known and had a peace about in my heart - our little girl is on her way.

A week and a shopping trip later, I can honestly say I am so excited to have a little girl.  I am anxious about many, many, MANY things, but I am full of excitement and expectation as we look forward to meeting her in November.